Lyv's Mothering Instincts

Since Day 1 of having a baby doll - Lyv has loved her. She instantly picked it up and hugged it to her chest. She now sleeps with "Baby Girl" and mothers her throughout the day. Her are some of the natural mothering skills she is already aquiring (note: this is NO reflection on what she sees her own mother do - I had to do that in case child services come to check this out!)

#1) Lots of Hugs and Loves - followed promptly by:

#2) A good whack in the face, preferrably when the baby is pinned down #3) What child doesn't love a little nibble on their fingers every now and then (okay so she is eating the entire hand, but you know it's out of love)

Summers Schenanigans

Mother Nature has been playing cruel tricks on us - a week ago we enjoyed 2 BEAUTIFUL Warm, even HOT days (Fri. temp was in the 70s). Two days later we had snow and much cooler temps. We had our first taste of spring-summer and we are thirsty for more.... Spring Fever has officially taken over at our house:

Jack and Sam have been outside everyday, rain, snow, or shine and come in filthy but happy. We think that Jack possibly has Raynaud's Syndrome (where you have extremely cold hands and feet) is suffering from the crazy temps because he has been out without gloves most days. To keep himself entertained inside he has resorted to art: the supplies my makeup; the canvas his face! Nice! He is also in the slow process of potty training, not too successfully yet. He does find great pride in going by his self, and so far TWIX are the reward of choice.

Wax On - Wax Off - the boys are in LOVE with Karate Kid right now and Jack shows off his Mr. Myagi skills daily, all by his little lonesome.

Sam has been busy getting set up for Kindergarten, Tee-ball, Swimming Lessons and Basketball Camp (thank you Crapo boys... this is mostly because of his trip home). He is such a great kid. I have been finding times during the days where he and I will have an actual conversation about meaningful things. It is really nice, and I'm going to miss him when school starts in the Fall. He is loving BYU sports and Jimmermania right now - along with his dad. Shawn is what we call "Jimmer Drunk"! He literally can't get enough of him.

Lyv is such a sweety - but a sassy one at that! She knows what she wants and she demands instant satisfaction. But she is too stinkin' cute to not give in to her charms (or squeels!) A few milestones: #1) Hair bow in hair without a headband - It lasted about as long as it took to take the picture and then was clawed out!

#2) 1st Hat! Love this cute little hat on her:

#3) Standing - she has been pulling herself up onto everything, but she gets really scared once she is up, because she hasn't figured out how to get back down. Her legs can only support that booty for so long before she starts trembling from the effort.#4) 2nd Ballerina Outfit - I LOVE this outfit on Lyv. You know the outfits that are just perfect, this one is on her.

Idaho Recap

We spent five weeks in Idaho and had a great time visiting with our family... here are some pictures of our time there! We spent a weekend in Othello, WA with the Keele's to attend Ryker's baptism ( I forgot my camera and used Dad's, so those pictures will have to be posted later). We rode horses and that was a great experience for me and Sam. I'm no horsewoman, in fact the horse I was riding, Jewel, just gave up hope and turned around heading back to the barn. It was the quickest horse ride in history. It was great to see Ryker get baptized, he is such an awesome 8 year old!

I also returned from brunette to blonde while home (my mom HATES my hair dark). I'm loving it and its more summery anyways...(Don't be fooled, though a close twin... that's not me! Love ya Cade!!)

Lyv had some major milestones while home, one of which I posted: her learning to crawl "normal" instead of the butt scoot. She is so funny because she continues to do BOTH. On hard floors she does the scoot and on carpet she crawls. She also got 4, yes 4, new teeth. AND... she is weened! She did really get. She is such a little gabber and won the hearts of everyone at home.

We got family pictures with the Summers' Fam and I can't wait to see those - but here is one of the time we were together. The Robinson's weren't there, but we had a great time seeing everyone and are so glad they are all in Idaho! Lyv was a favorite here too, especially with the girl cousins. They loved mothering her. She is so lucky.

We spent President's Day Weekend at the cabin, and this is where EVERYONE and I mean everyone proceeded to get sick. We had some major stomach flu, and for about 2 weeks I was up to my elbows in poop or vomit. Poor Jack took the brunt of this, and held on to his issues for several weeks. He is now getting back to normal, but seriously lost about 5 lbs. while home. I found him one morning sleeping like this. This is typical though with Jack. He has a really funny personality, and I find him sitting, laying, lounging in crazy positions with hands behind his head, or with his head in his hands (maybe its because he head is heavy:) He's a doll and lately has been all over Despicable Me... he sings the songs, quotes the lines, and dances!

Sam was over the moon to be back in Idaho and with cousins. There was not a day that went by that he didn't have a playmate. This was by far the highlight of the trip. Oh, and trips to the Dollar store and CAL Ranch!! I love this characteristic of Sam - He LOVES to shop!! I took him to the BYU bookstore to get a new BYU jersey and when we were done, he said, "Mom, that was the best thing ever!" I agree.... The day before we left, the Hill family headed to the local Bowling alley and tore up the alleys! It was so much fun, and a great way to end our time together.

We headed back home with my mom in tow. I love this lady and I'm so glad she got to come back with us. In January, I had arranged for her to come out and watch the kids while Shawn and I went to Florida for a podiatry conference. She accepted! We had a great time (again I forgot my camera - I'm totally losing my mind!) But we had a great time, relaxed, soaked up sun, and came home with a wicked tan and plenty of zzzz's.. Thanks mom!!

We came home to a new household feature - the gate! Lyv's mobility and header down the stairs prompted this installment. At first I was annoyed, now I'm in love! Not only does it eliminate any worry of Lyv falling down the stairs, but it also keeps Jack out of the kitchen. He hasn't figured out how to open it on his own YET, and I'm loving it. Though it looks like a jail, they really are bars of LOVE!!

Feeling Lucky

I get to be the mother of these THREE

wonderful, beautiful, healthy, happy, and did I mention FUN kids..... Pinch ME!!!

We started off St. Patty's Day with a hearty bowlful of Lucky Charms (you must say it with and Irish accent, me laddy)!
Then followed that up with lunch of green eggs and ham - and we do like them Sam, I am! More green will be following but for now, its time to go enjoy the nicer weather. We even have sunshine! This is my pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

Sam just said the funniest thing (he is SOOOO into celebrating holidays to the fullest...) "Its good to have Goldfish for a snack on St. Patrick's Day because leprachauns have "gold".

Life as I know It

As difficult as it is for me to do this, life goes on, and so must I. I find this a very difficult concept to embrace because part of me wants to cling onto the sadness and hurt just so I have something left of Ryan. I know that sounds crazy, but I'm scared to let myself completely recover because I don't want to have it ever be okay. I know that my life is forever changed, and hopefully for the good. I can handle the big issues of his death without any problem, I find myself missing him and getting sad when small simple things remind me of him and that he is truly gone. I heard Guns' and Roses the other day and broke down in sobs. I can't imagine the sorrow that his children and wife, and my parents are feeling.

But time marches on and so must we. One of Ryan's favorite quotes was "I have to laugh to keep from crying!" (from my Grandpa Bill) and in that same spirit, I have to find the and focus on the good to keep from despairing. Luckily for me, my children, Shawn, my family and my wonderful friends have provided so much love and support that I have felt compeletly bouyed up. Thank you all for you kindness, for your love, for you!

I have three resolutions that I have to record for myself as a result from this:

#1) To be a better friend - so many people commented on Ryan's ability to make everyone feel like they were his best friend. He was so good to others.

#2) To be more compassionate and not judge - those go hand in hand for me. We never know the situation behind anyones mistakes, problems, addictions, sadness, unkindness, etc. How many times have I passed judgement on someone, without thinking that they too might be a brother, a son, a husband, a friend, a father, and deserve like all of us to be loved. All we can do is give each other love - even Charity. It is that more than anything else that will heal our hearts and make a profound difference in the lives of those around us.

#3) To tell people I love them every opportunity I get!