Our Very Own Call of the Wildman Episode

HORRIFIED!  That is the best word to describe how I feel about the event that made any regrets of moving out of this amazing yard disappear.  About three weeks ago I decided to be a big helper and mow the lawn while Shawn was at work, and as I got closer to the rock wall in the back I noticed our friendly resident snake had popped out to say hello!  I texted Shawn and let him know that my mowing days were officially over.  Since that precious moment, Shawn reported that he saw the snake in the grass by the rock wall.  Still claiming the wall as it's domain, I wasn't too bothered by it.....now fast forward to yesterday.  The kids were bouncing off the walls, so I told them to go play outside, but I decided it would be fun to add "Make sure you look for the snake in the grass!"  Jack starts heading out the door and he yells, "Mom, there's a snake!"  I'm thinking to myself... haha funny, they are just being silly.  Sam joins him in his anxious cries, and so I walk over to see for myself, and sure enough a NASTY HUGE TERRIFYING snake is sitting there in the drive way!

That's when I start to loose it... I yell for the kids to get inside, and reach for my phone.  As I'm speed dialing Shawn and informing him that he will no longer have a family to come home to if he doesn't get his you know what home and take care of this issue... the kids inform me that there is another snake.  Again, I think they are just imagining things.  There is black tarping in the landscaping to help with the weeds, and I'm sure that is what they think they see....but NO!  It is in fact another snake sitting right next to the front step.  Again I'm terrified.  Shawn pulls up seconds later and I'm screaming at him through the safety of the front door - "TWO SNAKES!"  "TWO SNAKES"

Shawn seeing that there is no way to calm me down at this point takes matters into his own hands - literally!  He gloves up, comes trucking out of the garage with a squeegee, ready to take these boys down.  Sure enough, my knight in green scrubs - adeptly pins snake #1 down and carries him down the road to be set free in the neighbors yard (a nice gift from us....and probably a stupid idea since they'll most likely come back to our yard again....Shawn just felt bad killing them since they help keep "other critters" out - this issue is for another day!)  Then he's back to hunt down snake #2 who's moseyed its way to the big lawn, finds it and disposes of it the same way (maybe they'll eat each other?)

Snakes are at least out of sight....but not out of my mind!  I'm going a little crazy with thoughts of these things taking over the house.  I'm officially ready, BEYOND ready, to be gone.